A very nice weekend

Here comes another report from Robbie. Read it!!! It is hysterical! :-)))

Oh I had such a nice weekend that is all I can say. I hope all of you graduates (well as it done and dusted are we not post-graduates? Revise the CVs!) had a nice time and did not spew your food all over Sosume. I had another boring week at work but matters were moving rather in the wrong direction when they were including me in their plans to go to a German trade fair next March (I can see Dagmar’s eyes light up with envy) So I gave them my resignation letter telling them the Alps are calling me and a salary (paid in Euros) was too much for me to stay in Siberia. I felt a bit sorry for them but they have survived for 14 years so I don’t think I had a huge impact on any of their ridiculously inefficient and incompetent management practices. They will continue to survive because it’s Russia so they can make their money from even worse run Russian companies. Nothing interesting happened Monday to Friday apart from me getting to use a modern washing machine. That will be happening (fingers crossed) again tonight. So Friday I went to bed early then Saturday morning I went to see Anna- (the girl from Germany who has a habit of losing her knickers in bed with odd boys.) Her boss from Switzerland was here for a few days. Well all I can say is, no I can’t even say it- words are not enough to describe him- absolutely perfect- in every possible way.
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Although he has a girlfriend in Switzerland that did not stop me and an American girl making complete and utter fools of ourselves (well me more than her) by being extra-friendly to him. So Saturday night we went to an Australian boy’s party. Wish it was an Australian boys party- but hey you cant have everything. We had a small bottle of vodka and some beer with dinner before we went- and really it is true- you can’t not finish a bottle of vodka here, it is impossible. Anyway we were more than merry when we got there- after stopping off in the shop to get a bit more vodka and sok (juice). So we arrive at this party- it was very full- you could tell by the amount of shoes in the hall of the apartment. And within 5 seconds we have lost the bottle of vodka and the sok. This kind of sobered me up, as even though I don’t remember paying for it, I felt it was mine. Anyway it appeared after Me, Anna, Mel and the swiss guy all started to look a bit disappointed that our big bottle had been finished of by some Russians in about 30 seconds flat. So got pissed basically. It was a nice party and really the Russians cheered up when they sang (twice in a row) Soyuz nerroscheme respublik sobotnik, yes that old favourite- the Soviet national anthem. I understand how hard it is for them to learn the Russian anthem as it is the same music as the Soviet one, and most of the words are the same, but it would be like if there was a new version of “happy birthday” – same music but new words, you would just sing the old version. They really love it- they all through their hands up in the air and have big grins on their faces. Which for Russia is a seldom sight. One girl at the party- Marina is her name, well we called her “die Schlampe” gave me a big hug and she looked very happy about it- for me it was a reaffirmation of my sexual orientation. Sorry Schlampe but your sluty short skirt and horrid make-up do nothing for me. Early in the day she was (as far as I remember) in a leopard print jump suit. That was at a lecture held by Mel (the big noisy American) on American politics. Anyway that slut tried to sleep with the host of the party- and his Japanese girlfriend was there- nasty. Anyway I went home to Anna’s, Mr. Switzerland walked me home (well he was staying there also) I was meant to sleep in Anna’s bed with her but another boy beat me to it so it was the sofa for me. Sunday morning I woke up with the sorest head I have had in a long time, it was so so so so so sore, and I had only had beer and vodka and a cocktail thing. So we went for a walk to the sea. (Well the Ob sea, it is just a big lake but in Russia big lakes are about the size of small European countries) It has already frozen over so we went for a walk on it. I could see Russians far away doing ice fishing so I thought it must be thick enough to walk on- they did not get about 1km out onto the ice by helicopter. But still you are never sure of walking on ice- and it is only November. So me and Anna held on to each other as we walked very slowly across the ice. I remember from Berlin it is a bit scary walking on ice, no matter how thick it is- well the problem is you can’t really see how thick it is. My guess is more than 15cm your ok. Anyway we were kind of on a little iceberg and I wanted to see how thick the ice between the little icebergs was. All I can say is not very thick. I only fell about 5 cm into the water because I was holding on to Anna- still I think I will wait until December before walking on the lake again. The Russians know the right ways so they are ok. So nothing to do until Friday when it is a South African boy’s leaving party then French Elizabeth is organising a Thanksgiving Party Saturday, I bet she does great food- “but chwith ze horrid produce havailable er in ze supermarche” she will have a challenge to say the least. Anyway that is all from me- I miss you all- some more than others. 47 days to Austria!!!!!!